a lot of chaos... no flow.
2005-09-29, 1:05 a.m.

Dude... I'm so fucking bored. (my dad hates it when i call him dude) me and Darren had a night apart tonight. in the midst of our alleged romantic evening he told me basically that we should spend less time together. whatever. at least i got my laundry done
yup i did my laundry tonight. and sat sat and sat and sat...
talked to Mike for a minute, he's back with his "girlfriend" whom he cheated on. And is sad about having to break things off with the girl he cheated with... What's with this guy and cheating with fat/very young girls anyways?? I guess it's true (for the most part) what they say... once a cheater always a cheater... He will do it again.. and again. I can gaurentee it. As soon as Jocelyn (or some other 15 year old) bats her pretty little eye lashes... But who cares... It's not my problem. Every once in a while I have to admit that i do miss him, but I think i'm lucky to have gotten out when i did. This past year... without Mike, has been pretty much the best time of my life. It's the longest I've ever been consistently NOT depressed, although I do have my days/weeks. Darren and I have our problems, but we're definitely more suited for one another.
I almost think I'm typing because I have nothing better to do and it's another way to procrastinate going to bed. But wow. Do i ever have a lot of clean laundry. This whole giant stack of all my cute little panties. One day i was folding my laundry and kept showing my mom all my particularly cute ones,(which is like all of them) and she got fed up and was like next time i'm doing laundry i'm going to show you all my underwear. YIKES. i did my folding in here tonight with the door closed.
But I can't help but thinking.
I'm a lucky girl
October 12th will be our one year anniversary... I'm impressed. I don;t think either of us suspected we would ever last this long.
yesterday in my psychology of adolescence class, the prof was talking about how you get into relationships, and the first while is good,and then you realize that they have their quirks, which drive you insane, and things aren't as good as you once thought... But I think me and darren were the opposite of that, in the beginning... we didn't really have any common ground, I was a bit afraid of his some what radical mind set and opinions... But now more often than not, I just know that we're on the same page, thinking the same things...
And for real now I'm going to bed..
*sigh* bed

life - death