I don't wanna be normal like you
2003-07-14, 3:26 a.m.

Such a strong amount of hurt, jealousy. Everywhere I wish I was, she's there instead. Places she's not supposed to be. Territorial. Seeing people she's not supposed to be seeing. Possessive. Fuck you.

Everybody acts like they're doing me some huge favor by associating with me. I'm sorry it's such a chore.

Fuck you all.

I hope to be leaving soon, possibly until school starts. Screw making some money. People don't really need money, the government just convinces us we do. Commercialism, consumerism. Same with food. People have no idea of how little food you actually need. Just substitute it with water and sleep. You never once asked why I stopped eatting, there's a reason. Always compairing me to people, in negative ways.

This entry is about numerous people, don't assume it's you.

Only time and distance are keeping me from smiling. Attention is thrived upon. The red... Such a child. So alone.

Everclear played the Whiskey tonight, I wasn't there. Thank you Nola. For making my day. My sad pathetic day. Thank you Reed for giving me a reason to get out of bed at 6:30 last night after a 3 hour nap. Maybe I shall sleep now. Tomorrow I will wander the streets lost in thought, maybe alone. Don't make any assumptions. Just ask. Don't be angry. Sometimes I get this way. Loneliness is so difficult for me to deal with. Hold me tight, don't let me bleed to death.

My cat is a flower.

life - death