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2007-04-24, 7:14 p.m.

Throughout the years, Pen and I have found it quite humerous to "beat the system" which we always found pretty ammusing, but really in the long run amounted to very little. All I can think of right off the bat was getting a new transfer when we got off the bus when the one we had was about to expire, and paying children's rates the pool and places when we were 18. it saved us a few dollars, but really wasn't harming anybody. Not honest... but not terrible.
So now, here I am how ever much older, and am falling witness to seeing somebody who I care very much about, being absolutely brutalized by the system. How positively fucked up does somebody have to be before the so called professionals will take notice and do something to actually help them, as opposed to just sending them back out on their own to get into more catastrophes. Well as it seems, it takes a very long time, and a lot of self destruction (as well as damage to ones vehicle and a semi truck, theft, credit card fraud, identity theft, and the list goes on) What good is it going to do if somebody is admitted to a substandard 'mental health' ward for two days, and during those days they are allowed to come and go as they please, to smoke weed in the parking lot, loiter in the surrounding shopping area. I cannot even begin to express my frustration with the 'system' right now. Calgary's entire health care system is a total joke right now. Somebody who is in obvious need of psychiatric help should not be left to wander the streets, to hitchhike to Banff, and so on.
Poor guy, my heart goes out to you. I hope they figure this out.

In unrelated news, I am done school. I have officially survived my first year of university. While it was definitely a stressful (and expensive) adventure, I have made it. only... a lot more to go. I liked it more than I thought it would, and I ended up doing a lot better than I thought I would, considering what happened mid-semester and how much I didn't study around that time. And the 3 weeks of emotional upheaval that just left me sick to my stomach.

As relieved as I am to be done school, I can't help but be depressed at the same time. That I don't have anybody who would ever take me to London, or an employer who would fly me to NY to stay in a 5 star hotel, and to eat a restaraunt with that Hell's Kitchen guy (i don't watch that show, but I know they're going there)
I don't have a job for the summer yet. I look like an idiot and feel even more stupid in a suit, I'm not the type to wear a sweater vest. Maybe I'm meant to be a landscaper, like Darren. Or maybe I don't want to be filthy dirty.
I applied at Direct Energy yesterday by email, but I still have no heard back. I suppose within a day or 2 I can call and follow up on my resume. I don't know where else to apply though. I'm worried I've waited too long. As I have done with many other things. Like to go to the dentist, and the dr, and get my car fixed... I should have made appointments to get all of this done a month ago so I could be doing it this week, but nope. I was lazy.

life - death


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