2006-07-18, 8:17 a.m.

It's been 18 days since my last entry (but who's really counting) We're keeping pretty busy, between work and our regular weekend adventures. We spent an entire weekend home for the first time in a while last week, it was quite strange really. But it still passed just as quickly. The saturday we cleaned and cleaned and then Mike came up, me and dare had all sorts of zoomers and we took the train down to watch the stampede fire works, we sat on the side of this hill for hours, just as content as could be, Dare and Mike played guitar and we just chilled out and sang, then we realized it was like 1am and we should head back home, but the train sitting at the station wasn't moving, and the platform was PACKED with people, so we decided "why not walk...?" we made it to chinook station, where there were like 16 year old native girls beating the shit out of each other. The sunday we went to chinook (to check my schedule at garage, which of course told me i had no shifts...) and out of a moment of insanity I told Kevin that he could bring Dubetz over to our house, as well as his former 'girlfriend' things were OK with Aaron being there, until I sat for a second and realized that it was him and me and Darren sitting on the balcony... I think I'm ready to be an adult about it though.... I was so fucking irritable that night though, I was ready to punch Kevin in the head for trying to convince us that text messages cost $15 to send and receive... So I showed him a bill, that said that I sent 33 text messages and paid 4.95 for them, his explanation for that was that the first 33 are free...
The weekend before that was Canada Day, and we drove to Claresholm to realize that Mike and Kev were going to Lethbridge for the fireworks, so we went (in separate cars) to Lethbridge, they arrived several hours later than us of course, due to Kevin's impaired navigation skills I suppose. And then we were all supposed to go back to Claresholm and drink andparty and so on. ANd Kevin forgot about Darren and I, we went to bed, and they partied without us. I couldn't have been more pissed off at him. FUCK.
This past weekend we went down to Blairmore in the Crows Nest pass to see thunder in the valley. It was fun, we were there hours ahead of time and wasted time in this funny little fair, and made a lot of carni jokes. We then sat on our blanket for a few hours and sang and whatnot. THe fire works were quite impressive, but disappointingly short. We had to sit around for an hour before we even attempted to get on the highway, it was sooo crazy out there.
So here I am, finding myself with far less to say than I anticipated, It's 8:27, and I should be heading off to Crystal Gardens to water by myself. It won't be quite as fun without the helper I had last time. Oh well such is life. Doug probably would have prefered I be there at 8, but oh well. Last time I went I came home for a while first, then went there, did a lot less work than I should have, and then left quite early. I feel so unmotivated to work. I'm no longer really enjoying mowing, well I like the work itself, It's hard and I like feeling in shape, but I'm not really liking dealing with the idiots I have to work with. Like Rachel the stupid bitch who thinks she's she best lawn mower to have ever set foot on this earth, and therefore decides to act like a big bitch to everybody who isn't as fantastic as her. I would soo like to hit her in the face, but she told Darren she doesn't think she could hit me. BAHAHAHA. Hopefully it'll rain today, so I can just come home. I have no motivation to get up and go. But I should really go and make some lunch. Fuck i don't want to go tomorrow either. Imagine that.
Things with Darren and I are up and down, he would blame this all on me, in relation to my erratic moods and my whole 'everybody hates me' complex that is ever worsening. But last night he asked me if I could clean up my room so we could sleep in there together. But something is holding me back from wanting to do that. I feel like at the end of the day I need that space to myself, I like having my clothes all over the place and my stuff on the walls. ANd sometimes it's just him I need to get away from. As much as I love him. The ring that was supposed to materialize this month, has been bumped back to September. Ok I should really get going and make myself some lunch. Bleh More than anything I just want to go back to school, and not worry that nobody wants me on their crew or that I mow terribly... My cats have started hanging out in the empty bath tub. It's quite ammusing

life - death