I'm getting delerious
2005-08-07, 4:37 a.m.
It's almost 5 in the morning. i feel far to fantastic to go to bed. me and darren went to julio's barrio tonighto, it was somewhat disappointing, but we had fun. it's nice to go out, we don't seem to do it enough these days. and it turns out i don't like Canadian beer anymore. bah. that's the 2nd place i've been to lately that doesn't have Bud. what's with that anyways? me and darren decided that we're going to work on my 240 tomorrow, for a long time, we're going to try to figure out what's wrong with it.
i got a few job applications in the past couple days, for ikea, and vhq, and i'm going to apply to future shop and best buy, but it needs to be done online, which is ultimately LAME.
but in my travels of the internet tonight (i'm still waaaay too addicted to nexopia) i found this, and it made me laugh out in the darkness of the night
25 tHINGS tHAT wiLL mAKE yOUR pARENTS gO cRAZY -
1. Moo when they say your name...
2. Pluck someone's hair out and yell, "DNA"...
3. Wear a sticker that says, "I'm a retard"...
4. Hold their hand and whisper to them, I see dead people...
5. Try to swim in the floor...
6. Give yourself a swirly...
7. Run around with a lamp shade on your head yelling, "the sun!!! it's dying!!!"...
8. Have nervous spasms at spontaneous times...
9. Snort loudly when you laugh and then laugh harder...
10. Run in circles...
11. Pretend to beat yourself up...
12. Super glue your finger up your nose...
13. Lay face down and chant like an indian tribe...
14. Switch the light button on and off for a while. then say, "ooooh... I get it!!!"...
15. When you shower or bathe yell, "i'm drowning!!!"
16. Hide business cards from Spider's Tatoo Room around the house. Deny any involvement
17. Skull and Crossbones wallpaper
18. Send your parents a fax requesting that your allowance now be deposited into your swiss bank account
19. say "are we there yet?" before you leave the driveway(oldie but goodie)
20. Ask for a list of body parts they'd prefer unpierced
21. Have mall security page your mom as" that woman who refused to buy me that shirt from the gap"
22.tell them a tiny voice in your head keeps saying "buy shoes"
23. watch nascar and talk about "driving like that when i'm 16"
24. construct a house of toast on your front lawn
25. throw a couple of bricks in dads golf bag
.Fuck is that not hilarious?.
I used to have a list of like 63 fun things to do at wal mart. me and ashley did a few of them (ie. rexlaxing in the lawn furniture department for long periods of time, refering to the employees as Mr. wal mart or something to that extent) this was when we were 16, and looking back... it still seems just as funny. maybe i'm a loser... but oh well.
and also, i was in a thread that was a guy asking for help finding an engagment ring for his girlfriend (he already bought he an absolutely amazing promise ring when they were 17, but they're older now, and have a kid, so i guess she gets the real thing)
and these are the rings i want
it's absolutely gorgeous
this one is pretty good
and this one is ok too
*sigh* i wish i had the money to buy myself fancy sparkly objects, but even if i did have that much money, i know all too well that i would buy myself another sports car with more problems than i could ever list in one sentece. But i think I'm gonna rid myself of ONE of my cars... and a get an mx-6... i found one for 1750, and i reeeally want it. but it's unfortunate as hell that i just don't have that much money. damn me straight to hell for not having a job.
oh well. i think it's time for me to go to bed. seeing as this is getting kind of silly. i'm rambling on like hell. but it's ok. i still love me.
love is fucking brilliant (or maybe i'm deleriously tired, i've barely slept in days-due to picking reed up at the greyhound yesterday alli (hearts) reed, except that bastard was going to california, and we went to sunridge mall to eat in the food court, and we saw fucking dubetz there, so i grabbed him by the back of the neck, and slammed his face to the ground, and then did it again and again and again, and then i kicked in the testicles 14 times, just for good measure--but not so much. we just exchanged our usual smirks--because every so monthes we run into each other, always in the obscure of places--except i think he's working at sunridge--warning, there will be severe electrical problems)
anyways... GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!
PS. make sure you copy and paste those URLs to look at those rings...
ohh and this was so fucking hilarious that i had to edit this entry and add it in. i nearly peed myself during the entire thing, but i'm not sure if it's actually funny or if it's too late..
32 THINGS TO DO ON AN EXAM WHEN YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE GOING TO FAIL IT ANYWAYS!
1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.
4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.
6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 minutes.
7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
8. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.
9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.
10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, and continue with the exam.
12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.
13. Get the exam. 20 minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "**** this!" and walk out triumphantly.
14. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)
15. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).
16. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
17. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early.
18. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.
20. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.
21. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.
22. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.
23. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, and then cough. Repeat if necessary.
25. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"
26. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!
27. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.
28. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."
29. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.
30. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, and ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.
31.Trip people as they walk by your desk.
32.Stand up after about 15 minutes, and say loudly, "Okay, let's double-check our answers! Number one, A. Number two, C. Number three, E...."
life - death